What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
