Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize