I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You ate ashes out of my bong
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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