D3 body, D1 cock
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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