I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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