i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
