What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
