i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize