Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
