I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
