Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize