All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
