Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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