I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
