like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
