You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize