I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
