I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
