Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize