It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You've changed since you got that strap on
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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