He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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