The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We left an ass print on the piano.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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