so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i already hear my dad disowning me
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
