Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
