in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize