I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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