I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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