I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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