He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
