? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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