I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
