My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
