I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
