She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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