so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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