I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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