It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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