Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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