The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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