I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i think i just lost a toe
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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