Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
