Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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