The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
