i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
They have beer where we have blood.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
