I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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