I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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