I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
