But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
