i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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