Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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