put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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